Childhood trauma therapy for adults ready to set it down
What happened to you as a child was not your fault, and you do not have to keep carrying it alone. Therapy for childhood trauma gives the adult you a careful, private space to make sense of those experiences and loosen their hold on the present.
Childhood trauma can include abuse, neglect, violence at home, a parent's addiction or serious illness, sudden loss, bullying, or growing up in a household that felt chaotic or unsafe. Years later it may surface as burnout, shame, reactivity or a sense that you are always holding something back. I work with adults across New York State, combining talk therapy, somatic approaches and psychiatric care when it is needed.
“You were a child with no power to change what happened. Now there is an adult present who can listen, protect and decide what comes next.”
Therapy builds that adult presence so that the younger parts of you no longer have to manage everything on their own.
How childhood trauma follows us into adulthood
Childhood trauma refers to frightening, painful or overwhelming experiences that happened before you had the resources to process them, and that left a lasting mark.
Some childhood trauma is easy to name: physical, sexual or emotional abuse, witnessing violence between adults, losing a parent, being placed in care, or living with someone whose drinking or drug use made home unpredictable. Other experiences are harder to put into words, such as being repeatedly humiliated, threatened, left alone for long periods or made responsible for an adult's wellbeing. Whatever the details, a child in these situations has to find a way to survive with limited understanding and little control.
Those survival strategies often continue long after the danger has passed. A child who learned to stay silent may become an adult who cannot speak up at work. A child who had to stay alert may become an adult who cannot sleep. Some memories are vivid and intrusive, while others are fragmented, missing or felt mostly in the body. All of these responses are understandable, and none of them mean you are broken.
Adults often seek childhood trauma therapy when something in the present stirs up the past: becoming a parent, a parent's illness or death, a new relationship, a family gathering, or simply reaching a point where the old coping no longer works. You do not need a crisis to deserve support. Wanting to understand yourself more fully is reason enough.
Memory, the body and what we do not remember
It is very common to have gaps in childhood memory, or to doubt whether what you remember is accurate. In therapy I do not push for recovered memories or ask you to prove anything. We work with what you know, what you feel and what your body tells us, and we let understanding emerge without pressure. Your experience is taken seriously whether it arrives as a clear story or as a sensation you cannot yet explain.
Parts of you that are still young
Many people find it helpful to think of themselves as having different parts: a younger self who still feels frightened or ashamed, a protective part that keeps everyone at a distance, a capable part that holds life together. Gently getting to know these parts can reduce inner conflict and help you respond to old triggers from a steadier, more compassionate place.
Family relationships now
Childhood trauma often raises practical questions in adult life: how much contact to have with family, how to manage holidays, whether to speak about what happened. There is no correct answer. We can think these decisions through together, so that whatever you choose reflects your needs rather than old obligations.
Signs the past may still be shaping today
The after-effects of childhood trauma can be surprisingly varied. Some people feel too much, others feel very little, and many swing between the two. If you recognise yourself in some of the experiences below, therapy may help you understand where they come from and what might ease them.
- Intense reactions that feel bigger than the moment
- Persistent shame or self-blame
- Burnout from never letting your guard down
- Difficulty trusting partners or friends
- Intrusive memories, nightmares or flashbacks
- Feeling small around family members
- Avoiding places, smells or dates
- Struggling to feel joy or safety
- Patterns of relationships that echo childhood
Childhood trauma therapy that respects your boundaries
There is no single method for healing childhood trauma. I draw on several approaches and tailor them to you, with your consent guiding every step and longer sessions allowing time to arrive, explore and settle before you leave.
Telling your story, your way
You can share as much or as little as you choose, in whatever order makes sense. Sometimes putting experiences into words for the first time to someone who believes you is itself a turning point. Other times we focus on the present and approach the past more slowly.
Parts-informed work
We get to know the younger and protective parts of you with curiosity, understanding what each is trying to do. This reduces the inner battle between wanting to heal and wanting to keep everything locked away, and helps the adult you take the lead.
Somatic grounding
When memories or feelings surface, body-based tools help you stay anchored in the present. We practise noticing your feet on the floor, your breath, or the room around you, so that remembering does not mean being pulled back into the past.
Feminist and relational lenses
Childhood trauma always happens within families, cultures and power structures. Feminist and relational perspectives help us see how gender, sexuality, class and silence shaped what happened and how it was handled, which can lift some of the shame you may have absorbed.
Medication when it helps
Some adult survivors live with depression, anxiety, panic or sleep disruption that makes therapy harder to engage with. I can assess these, discuss medication or supplements that may support you, and adjust anything gradually and collaboratively within the same relationship.
Care between sessions
We build a toolkit for difficult days: grounding practices, ways to soothe your body before sleep, and plans for anniversaries or family events that tend to stir things up. You leave each session with something steadying to return to.
What this work is and is not
Healing from childhood trauma does not require reliving every detail or forgiving anyone before you are ready.
It is not
- Being pushed to recount everything at once
- Searching for memories you cannot find
- Being told to move on or let go
- Pressure to confront or reconcile with family
- A fixed programme you must fit into
It is
- Moving at a pace your body can tolerate
- Trusting what you do know and feel
- Making room for grief and anger
- Deciding family boundaries on your terms
- A plan shaped around your life and goals
Your first steps in childhood trauma therapy
We begin slowly, with stability and trust before any deeper work.
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1
Free consultation 15 minutes
A brief, confidential call to talk about what you are looking for. You do not need to disclose what happened to you. We focus on whether you feel comfortable with me and whether my approach to childhood trauma therapy suits what you need right now.
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2
Getting to know you
In our first full session I ask about your current life, health, relationships and supports, and only as much about childhood as you wish to share. If symptoms such as depression, anxiety or sleep problems are present, I assess them and talk with you about options.
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3
Stabilising the present
Before revisiting difficult memories, we make sure you have reliable ways to calm your body, manage triggers and look after yourself between sessions. This phase can bring real relief on its own and creates a safe base for what follows.
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4
Working with the past
When you feel ready, we approach childhood experiences more directly, using talk, parts work and somatic tools in combination. The aim is not to erase the past but to integrate it, so it becomes something that happened rather than something still happening.
Francesca Rome-Marie, PMHNP-BC
I bring together psychiatry, psychotherapy, somatic work and whole-body health, informed by years in primary care and further study in gender theory, feminist thought, culture and visual art.
I keep a deliberately small caseload so that every client receives consistent, unhurried and genuinely attentive care, held within one relationship rather than split across several providers.
Clear, upfront rates
I don't accept insurance. Modern Holistic Psychiatry is an out-of-network provider, so sessions are paid for directly. Depending on your plan, you may be able to claim reimbursement through your out-of-network benefits.
Find out how much your insurance may coverNeed urgent support? If you're in crisis or thinking about harming yourself, call or text 988 (Suicide & Crisis Lifeline) or call 911.
Therapy for Childhood Trauma FAQs
Is it too late to get therapy for childhood trauma as an adult?
It is never too late. Many people begin childhood trauma therapy in their thirties, fifties or seventies, often when life circumstances shift or they finally have the space to look inward. The brain and nervous system remain capable of change throughout life. Whatever your age, therapy can help you understand your history and relate to it differently.
What if I do not remember much of my childhood?
Memory gaps are common after childhood trauma and are not a barrier to therapy. We do not need a complete story to work together. We can attend to how the past shows up now, in your feelings, relationships and body, and allow understanding to develop naturally. I will never pressure you to uncover or confirm memories.
Do I have to talk about the details of my abuse?
No. You decide what you share and when. Some people find relief in telling their story fully; others prefer to work with its effects without revisiting specifics. Somatic and parts-informed approaches allow meaningful healing without detailed retelling. If you ever feel overwhelmed in session, we pause and return to grounding.
Can childhood trauma cause depression or anxiety later in life?
Difficult early experiences are often connected to later depression, anxiety, sleep problems and difficulties with relationships, though everyone's path is different. As a psychiatric nurse practitioner I can assess these symptoms, offer a clear explanation of what may be happening, and discuss whether medication or supplements might support you alongside therapy.
How is childhood trauma therapy different from developmental trauma therapy?
The two overlap. I tend to use childhood trauma to describe specific painful experiences or circumstances, such as abuse, violence, loss or a parent's addiction, whereas developmental trauma emphasises the ongoing absence of attuned care during formative years. Many people carry both. In practice we work with whatever is most alive for you.
Should I confront my family about what happened?
That is entirely your decision, and there is no right answer. Some people find speaking up important; others find it unsafe or unhelpful. In therapy we can explore what you hope a conversation would achieve, what the risks might be, and what boundaries protect you. You never need to confront or forgive anyone to heal.
Where do you offer childhood trauma therapy?
My practice is based at 41 Union Square West in Manhattan, and I support adult clients across New York State. During your free consultation we can talk through practical arrangements and anything that would help you feel more comfortable starting childhood trauma therapy with me.
You do not have to carry it alone
When you are ready, book a free 15-minute consultation. We can talk about what you need and how childhood trauma therapy might support you.